And like every Tuesday, it's weigh-in day. And I'm happy. You may be confused by this - especially since I am about to tell you that I am actually up a pound, back at 299.
But I'm happy. About a few things, even. I'm happy that it's not in the 300s. I'm happy that I'm on this journey. And I'm happy that I feel like I'm hitting my stride again.
I know - I know. Heidi, you are up a pound. How are you hitting your stride?
Well, I had a few challenges this weekend... mostly having to do with feeling lonely, and the ensuing depression, and as a result, eating a few larger-than-they-needed-to-be meals that I didn't cook myself. Since Tom's now on 14-hour days, plus 9 hours each weekend day, I'm on my own a lot. And if there's no one in my immediate vicinity to check in with, I have a harder time keeping those meals in check.
Since Tom started working away at his current gig, I'd also been cooking a batch of food at the beginning of the week that I would dole out for lunches. Tom is - in my opinion - the more gifted cook between us (though I'm getting better!) and when we were both working from home, he handled all of our lunches and dinners (other than my own protein, since he doesn't eat it.) The trouble is that I get easily bored. And lunches all year were our "special" meal - we usually made them larger and with more variety.
But, yes - I have hit my stride again. I did this in a few different ways:
- When I sat down to plan my food for the week, I decided I'd try to cook a different breakfast, lunch and dinner, from Monday to Friday.
- Putting a solid schedule together with time set aside for cooking has helped me put some structure back into my day, which was increasingly getting away from me.
- Since I struggled with my accountability last week, I decided I'd also photograph each meal this week, and share them here. (I'll even post brief photo entries on Saturday and Sunday to keep up my momentum.)
- My core problem - loneliness - isn't fixed by hermit-like behavior. The more I skulk around in my own shell, the more depressed I become. So I've been making an effort to be more social this week. My dad and I are doing daily check-in caalls to discuss our food. I went to a crafting day on Sunday, I had a Skype date with Rena on Monday, a picnic date with Audra today, and there's a Thursday lady-date with Patty and Alexa. Plus three separate social occasions this upcoming weekend.
- A byproduct of shell-skulking is negative self-talk. It has been my natural state for a long time, and even when I feel like I've mastered it, it happens again before I can even realize I'm doing it. I'm back to acknowledging myself when I catch negative self-talk, and curbing it as soon as I do. Man, it helps.
- And, a never-fail pick-me-up: exercise. I did well last week (5 workouts) and I'm planning to beat that this week.
I'm feeling happier, I'm taking more action, and I'm taking better care of me.
Here's what I ate on Monday:
|1 slice whole-grain toast, 1 tb fat-free ricotta mixed with a splash of sugar-free almond Torani, sliced nectarine.|
|6 oz skim milk, vitamins & meds.|
|Light tortilla with 4 oz grilled turkey burger with 1 Laughing Cow wedge and pickles.|
1 turnip, baked - with ketchup. 1 plum. Water.
|1 small baked potato with 1 tsp Earth Balance and 2 tb TJ's fat free sour cream. (Best 15 calories ever.)|
|2 cups of steamed broccoli with lemon.|
Not pictured: 64 oz water, 1 Sobe LifeWater Zero, 1 donut. (Yes. Sue me.)
Calorie total for the day: 1340. With donut.
OK. I'm on track. How are you? Anything we can talk about, to help you get there? To help you take care of you?