Weigh-in Tuesday: What I Ate Today

Happy Tuesday, everybody. 

And like every Tuesday, it's weigh-in day.  And I'm happy.  You may be confused by this - especially since I am about to tell you that I am actually up a pound, back at 299.

But I'm happy.  About a few things, even.  I'm happy that it's not in the 300s.  I'm happy that I'm on this journey.  And I'm happy that I feel like I'm hitting my stride again.

I know - I know.  Heidi, you are up a pound.  How are you hitting your stride?

Well, I had a few challenges this weekend... mostly having to do with feeling lonely, and the ensuing depression, and as a result, eating a few larger-than-they-needed-to-be meals that I didn't cook myself.  Since Tom's now on 14-hour days, plus 9 hours each weekend day, I'm on my own a lot.  And if there's no one in my immediate vicinity to check in with, I have a harder time keeping those meals in check. 

Since Tom started working away at his current gig, I'd also been cooking a batch of food at the beginning of the week that I would dole out for lunches.  Tom is - in my opinion - the more gifted cook between us (though I'm getting better!) and when we were both working from home, he handled all of our lunches and dinners (other than my own protein, since he doesn't eat it.)  The trouble is that I get easily bored.  And lunches all year were our "special" meal - we usually made them larger and with more variety. 

But, yes - I have hit my stride again.  I did this in a few different ways:

• When I sat down to plan my food for the week, I decided I'd try to cook a different breakfast, lunch and dinner,  from Monday to Friday.  
• Putting a solid schedule together with time set aside for cooking has helped me put some structure back into my day, which was increasingly getting away from me.  
• Since I struggled with my accountability last week, I decided I'd also photograph each meal this week, and share them here.  (I'll even post brief photo entries on Saturday and Sunday to keep up my momentum.)
• My core problem - loneliness - isn't fixed by hermit-like behavior.  The more I skulk around in my own shell, the more depressed I become.  So I've been making an effort to be more social this week.  My dad and I are doing daily check-in caalls to discuss our food.  I went to a crafting day on Sunday, I had a Skype date with Rena on Monday, a picnic date with Audra today, and there's a Thursday lady-date with Patty and Alexa.  Plus three separate social occasions this upcoming weekend. 
• A byproduct of shell-skulking is negative self-talk.  It has been my natural state for a long time, and even when I feel like I've mastered it, it happens again before I can even realize I'm doing it.  I'm back to acknowledging myself when I catch negative self-talk, and curbing it as soon as I do.  Man, it helps.
• And, a never-fail pick-me-up: exercise.  I did well last week (5 workouts) and I'm planning to beat that this week.

I'm feeling happier, I'm taking more action, and I'm taking better care of me. 

Here's what I ate on Monday:

1 slice whole-grain toast, 1 tb fat-free ricotta mixed with a splash of sugar-free almond Torani, sliced nectarine.

Boiled egg.

6 oz skim milk, vitamins & meds.

Light tortilla with 4 oz grilled turkey burger with 1 Laughing Cow wedge and pickles.
1 turnip, baked - with ketchup.  1 plum.  Water.

1 small baked potato with 1 tsp Earth Balance and 2 tb TJ's fat free sour cream. (Best 15 calories ever.)

2 cups of steamed broccoli with lemon.

Not pictured: 64 oz water, 1 Sobe LifeWater Zero, 1 donut.  (Yes. Sue me.)

Calorie total for the day: 1340. With donut.


**

OK.  I'm on track.  How are you?  Anything we can talk about, to help you get there?  To help you take care of you?

Weigh-in Tuesday... in the balance

I weighed in this morning with a flat line between last week and this week.  Nothing gained, nothing lost.  Better than something gained, for sure, but not what I hoped for.

Last week had its challenges, and chief among them was my energy level.  I helped Dad with painting every day last week.  I'm not sure exactly why it sapped my energy, but it definitely did. I didn't get my butt to the gym as often as I usually do, so this week I've decided to return to the schedule that helps me best: alternating higher-impact aerobics (at Slimmons) with lower-impact exercise (like swimming and yoga.) I'm aiming for 60 minutes or more, 6 days a week.  I'm determined to have a balanced exercise schedule.

 In fact, I'm determined to find balance in all things.  I know that it's not generally possible, but I like to aim for center (perhaps, as my friend Lisa says, waving at it as I swing past.)

The biggest thing that brought balance to my food habits is actually Richard Simmons' Food Mover system.  When I visited Slimmons for the first time, Richard recommended it to me, and his long-time student Felise taught us the ropes.

This is the FoodMover package, which - if you're inclined - you can order here.
(Just for integrity's sake, I wanted to disclose that I have not been paid to review this.)

Basically, there's a little plastic device with sliding windows, and interchangeable cards.  If you're eating, say, 1400 calories a day, you'd slide in the "1400" card and it would tell you exactly how to balance your diet between servings of carbs/protein/veggies/etc.  As you eat each allotted serving, you close a window.  (When I have a serving of fruit, I close one of the little "apple" windows.)  It comes with a booklet that defines the servings sizes, and after about a week or two of working with it, we had most of our favorites memorized.  

It was surprising just how well-balanced our diets became as we were paying close attention to portion sizes and balance.  Before we started, it wasn't unusual for us to share a half-box of pasta or more.  We expected that if we ate less pasta, we'd be much hungrier.  Thanks to Food Mover, we learned that we never had to feel hungry if we ate all of the rest of the defined servings in a day.  Turns out that if you close all your little "portion windows," not only have you eaten exactly what you set out to eat, you are surprisingly satiated.

FoodMover is an excellent guideline, but I'll admit that the more comfortable I've been with healthy eating, the less attention I've paid.  To help with my general balance, this week I've decided to return to daily FoodMovin', and I'll be sharing my food log in the process for the next 7 days.  I'll explain the "windows" I've closed for each meal.

Here's my FoodMover after lunch & afternoon snack, and before dinner (and lots of afternoon water.)
I'd eaten all of my allotted starch, and had 2 fruit, 3 protein, 1 fat, 3 veg, 1 dairy and 6 water remaining.

  
And here's my log for Monday:
Breakfast - 1 whole-wheat bagel (2 starch windows), 1 tb lox spread (1 fat window), 2 tomato slices (negligible calories.)
Lunch - 1 low-cal tortilla (1 starch) with 4 oz lean grilled ground turkey (2 protein), 1 tsp light vegenaise and 1 tb low-cal blue cheese aioli (1 fat), baked yam fries (2 starch),
Snack - A bottle of Trader Joe's red veggie juice (2 veg, 1 fruit)
Dinner - Personal frittata with 2 eggs (2 protein), swiss chard & leek (2 veg), and 1 oz goat cheese (1 dairy), 1 baked apple with tsp cinnamon/sugar (2 fruit)
Beverage -  12 oz of zero calorie Steaz (1 extra), 8 oz skim milk (1 dairy), 64 oz water (8 water)

Per Richard's suggestion, I usually eat my carbs earlier in the day - though sometimes I spread them out a little more.  All the better balance the blood sugar, my dear.

I have one other goal for my balance this week - I would like to precede my workday with a period of meditation, prayer and centering.  It really helps me, all-around.

What are you doing to find balance in your life this week?  Whatever it is, I hope it helps you to take care of you.

Weigh-in Tuesday, and thoughts on empty calories

I'll get right to the point this morning: this week, I'm down another pound and a half. 298!  The farther I get from 300, the more confident I feel about staying away from it forever.

Last week's therapy session was very insightful.  My therapist always helps me see things more clearly, even if they're things I've just said out loud.  It's funny how saying things out loud doesn't necessarily mean that it sinks in.  I was telling her how strangely terrifying it is to not know how you look at a lower weight.  The last time I was less than 300, it was in college.  I was 12 years younger (and those 12 years are kind of a big deal; faces change a lot from 20 to 32.)  From here on, as I lose weight, I'm going to start not recognizing myself.  My therapist connected that fear with my plateau (and with the binge after weigh-in that I wrote about last week.)  My subconscious is having trouble dealing with the fact that there's a lot of change going on with my body.  So I'm doing some visualization exercises, and hopefully we'll shake that subconscious into acceptance.

The survey I posted yesterday (which is still open if you'd like to participate) has been very helpful.  It's sometimes hard to peg what kinds of blog entries (or themes) are most compelling to my readers, and it's very helpful to hear what works and what doesn't. 

I did get one answer about improving the blog that made me stop and think. And think. And think. And if there's that much thinking, it must be something important.  This reader - a friend or family member who knows me from Facebook - would change this about my blog:


"Less about sweet things-- reading about sugar and other empty calories makes me anxious."

I was surprised by the answer, and my knee-jerk response was: "What empty calories?"  I work very hard on keeping all things in moderation.  It's true that if I eat emotionally, it's primarily sugar that I'm craving.  But even those times when I eat an unplanned food, I'm not eating a lot of it. For instance, last week's binge, which was an ice cream cone.  It's not the amount of food that makes it a binge.  It's the reasoning behind my eating.  It's the unplanned and not-mindful way I am eating.  Which, as a food addict, does happen occasionally.  And I'm working very hard to minimize it in my life.

Do I come across as eating a lot of empty calories?  I'm kind of surprised about that, because for the first time in my life, this year has seen the complete elimination of all fast food (it's been 9 months since I've so much as stepped inside one, let alone eaten at one.) 

We cook, on average, 20 out of 21 meals each week, and that one meal out is most likely at Tender Greens, where I've ordered my usual 3 ounces of seared albacore, a cup of mixed greens and either roasted veggies or a half-cup of mashed potatoes (550 or 650 calories total.)  We buy 48 servings of fresh fruit and 72 servings of fresh vegetables every week, and they're gone by the end of the week.  (that's 3 servings of fruit daily for me, and 5+ servings of vegetables.) 

With rare exception, I eat around 1400 calories daily. Yesterday's, for example, was a pretty standard day.

Breakfast: 
1 slice whole grain toast (70 calories)
Sliced nectarine
2 tb fat free ricotta (mixed with a sprinkle of cinnamon and a 1/4 teaspoon of sugar-free almond syrup) (25 calories)
1/4 tsp honey (6 calories)
1 boiled egg (70 calories)

Lunch: 
4 ounces of grilled ground turkey (160 calories)
2 slices of light whole wheat (80 calories)
1 tsp lowfat vegenaise (15 calories)
1 laughing cow cheese wedge (30 calories)
3 pickle slices (negligible calories) 
1 cup of baked yam (177 calories)
1 tb of homemade blue cheese aioli (30 calories)

Afternoon snack:
1 plum (30 calories)

Dinner:
1 cup baked spaghetti squash with 1/2 slice turkey bacon, tsp Parmesan, and 1/4 of an egg (94 calories)
1 cup roasted veggies with tsp balsamic & a spritz of Pam (110 calories)
1/2 cup white beans with sage and garlic & a 1/2 tsp olive oil (134 calories)

Beverages:
64 ounces of water (0 calories)
8 ounces of stevia-sweetened Virgil's (0 calories)
8 ounces of skim milk (70 calories)

Where do the empty calories fit in?  You could say the cheese is "empty," but it fits into my scheduled fats, and I'm still getting the majority of my necessary fat intake from unsaturated sources (olive oil, vegenaise.)  And honestly, regular small servings of things like cheese keep me from seeking large servings of things like cheese.

Nevertheless, the survey answer stung.  So it must be touching a nerve.  I went back to my recipes, to catalogue them, to see if I posted a lot of recipes for sweet things.  Here's the most recent two pages of recipes, going back to late June:

Savory
Rosemary Quinoa
Curried Chickpea Salad
Broccoli Slaw
Blue Cheese Aioli
Southwestern Popcorn
Roasted Zucchini
Heirloom Tomato & Egg Sandwich
Ginger Noodle Stir-Fry
Stuffed Squash Blossoms

Sweet
Cinnamon-Sugar Popcorn
Zucchini-Blueberry Mini Muffins
Figs with Goat Cheese
Key Lime Mini Tarts
Diet Butterbeer
Whole Wheat Pancakes with Fruit Compote

So, yeah.  OK.  They're right.  There are several sweet recipes.  Though most are low-calorie, and most are sweetened with fruit.  Still, it proves that I do include a bunch of sweet recipes.  Too much for one of my readers.  How about you?  Would you prefer to see less sweet?  Are you worried about my empty calories?  Would you prefer, for instance, when I post the recipes for the most recent Supper Club 600, that I skip the 50-calorie tiramisu recipe?

I'm torn.  Part of me wants to listen and take heed.  There were times in the past where I didn't want to hear people's thoughts on my dietary intake, and it wasn't for the best.  But part of me... knows exactly what I eat, why I eat, and how hard I'm working on what I eat.  And that part of me just wants to say, "FORGET YOU*, I'm taking care of me, and you don't get a say in how that's done."

Because it is being done. 

Take care of you today.  You're the only one who gets to do it.


*Cee-Lo Green radio-edited for politeness.

Adventure Wednesday at U.C. Sunnydale

Yesterday was a rough day. I think I was experiencing the grief that didn't show up Monday, which was the two-year anniversary of my mom's passing.  I could not shake bone-deep blues, even when I pulled myself out of the house to do a little thrift window-shopping.  Fortunately, Tom helped to get me going for class last night.  I was so grateful for all of my friends there. Especially Joanne, who surprised me with fresh flowers from her garden.  (Also Kat, who brought me a terrific photo of the first Oscars at the Biltmore.)  I tell you, Slimmons is the most supportive community a girl could ask for, exercise-based or not.

But today? Today is Adventure Wednesday, and I'm taking you on a journey to U.C. Sunnydale, alma mater of one Buffy Summers.





Well, kind of.  U.C. Sunnydale doesn't really exist, but it was shot on the campus of UCLA, where we recently accompanied David (of Keep It Up, David fame) to see the Los Angeles Chamber Orchestra perform the scores for a few silent film shorts.  David had invited us after hearing that Tom was a big Chaplin geek (and me, too - to a less obsessive extent.) We were both thrilled to join him!

We are undoubtedly nerd-fans. Here we are with Charlie at the
Hollywood Wax Museum. Photo care of (and including) one Ms. A.R.H.
And... hey, we used to look different. This was last summer.

I'd never been to the UCLA campus before - it's beautiful.  Both David and I remarked that it reminded us of our own alma mater, University of Michigan.

The buildings are similarly classic-looking. This one is the library.

Here is Royce Hall, where we saw the orchestra perform.

It's home to all kinds of beautiful flowers.

Anybody know what these are? I'd love to plant them someday.

Lovely trees, too.

Not-so-lovely stairs. Mastering the art of the climb really needs to be my next fitness quest.

While we were there, the cheer squad was having their professional pictures taken.

I've heard of bare feet, but this is ridiculous.  Wokka-wokka-wokka!

We met up with David with just enough time to do the standard blogger portraits before the show started.

Tom in his dapper new haircut, wearing his grandfather's tweed jacket which fits for the first time in years.
I, with hair swept by the wind, in my vintage lemon necklace from Dazzles in Palm Springs.

Plus David looking sleek in his jacket.  Good we all had outer layers - it was chilly!

 The performance itself was really terrific.  The orchestra played beautifully, and in perfect time with the movies (A Dog's Life which I had seen before, and Shoulder Arms which I hadn't.)  They were introduced by Leonard Maltin, who is such a wonderful font of film knowledge.  And I think this marks the first time I've ever heard a hand-saw played live with an orchestra...  there's a dance hall section with a morose soprano, and the saw solo was amazing (and sounded very much like a morose soprano!)

One of my favorite parts of the evening was the opening short film, an Oswald the Lucky Rabbit cartoon by Walt Disney, which featured the premiere of a brand new score written for the occasion by Alexander Rannie.  The score was brilliant, and unlike the Chaplin scores, the Oswald score featured a very involved percussion accompaniment, with delightful (and delightfully complex) musical sound effects.  It was like watching a foley artist working live.  (Don't know about foley artists?  Here's a little video about one of Disney's foley artists.)




You can watch the Oswald cartoon, "Trolley Troubles," but it doesn't have the brilliant new score. I hope Disney will re-release it.





After our evening of silent film, we parted ways with David and headed to a nearby Persian/Iranian restaurant called Javan, which we'd found on Yelp.  Tom and I both enjoy Mediterranean/Middle-Eastern food, but we'd never tried specifically Iranian food before.  As always, we were up for an adventure!

When we sat down, they brought us a basket of nearly paper-thin lavash bread.

It came with  butter, and the strangest bread accompaniment I've ever seen: raw onion.
But it was the sweetest, lightest onion I've ever eaten. Amazing with the lavash, and so surprising.

Since I am a fan of Indian Lassi, I ordered a yogurt drink. I didn't realize it would
be salty and savory - so every time I drank, I had to remind myself that it was
not going to be sweet. Reminded me of the Crystal Pepsi experience!

We shared a small side of mixed veggie pickles...

...and a side salad...

...with feta on the side.  I only ate a little.

Tom ordered a roasted eggplant stew, which was tasty.

I had a chicken stew in this amazing pomegranate-walnut sauce. I expected it to be like Honey-Walnut Shrimp, but the walnuts were ground into the the sauce, which made for a really nice texture and flavor.

Plus basmati rice.

Here's another example of how the portion sizes of restaurants are jacked up.  I ate a half lavash with butter and onion, a cup of the pickles and a cup of the salad, plus 2 ounces of chicken, 1 cup of rice, and 1/4 cup of the sauce... which was a really filling.  And yet, here is what was left over:

The leftovers were about the same size of my healthy and filling portion.
You can see the yogurt drink was not my thing, but hey, it's an adventure!

Again, a trip to the restaurant shows me that I can eat healthfully when I'm out - provided I make the right choices and eat the right portions.

And speaking of right portions... here is part six of my week of food loggin'.  It's good to be back, because as you can see, I can adjust by the end of the night if I haven't gotten enough calories, or enough of a particular food group.  (In this case, fat/protein, thus the peanut butter dessert and the random dinner egg white.)

Tuesday, May 24 - 1409 calories
Breakfast - 1/2 cup greek yogurt, 1/2 cup rhubarb parfait, 1/2 cup honey oat cereal, 1 boiled egg
Lunch - 1 pear, Tom's "fried" rice (Pam, 2/3 cup rice, 1/2 an eggplant, 1/2 an onion, 1/2 cup mushrooms, 1 clove garlic, 1 tb ginger, 1/2 tb light soy sauce, 1 egg)
Dinner - chicken wrap sandwich (low-cal tortilla, 1 tsp Vegenaise, 1 oz brie, 2 oz chicken, 2 cherry tomatoes, 1/2 cup spinach), 1.5 cups roasted cauliflower, 1 oz goat cheese, 1 cup strawberries, 1 egg white, dessert (1 tb natural peanut butter, 1 tsp powdered sugar mixed together, with 12 chocolate chips)
Beverages -12 oz skim milk, 44 oz water

All right.  I'm off to do some writing, and I hope you all have a lovely and productive day, too. Take care of you!

Weigh-in Tuesday, plus Bebop-a-Reebop Rhubarb Sauce (& parfait)

Happy Tuesday to you.  Nothing spectacular on the scale this morning, just a .2 pound loss.  Hey, downward is downward, and considering my gradual veer from the path last week, a small loss is not unexpected. I do have some other non-scale victories, though.  A pair of boot-cut jeans that were far too tight in January (and which I chopped up to make boyfriend-style cropped cuffs) is officially falling off me.  Time for the next jeans size down - and this one is the last pair of too-small pants I'd saved over the years.

I was excited for this morning's post-weigh-in breakfast.  This weekend I found rhubarb at the farmer's market, so I made sauce to go with my yogurt this week.

I'm no stranger to rhubarb in yogurt.  While in Italy on our honeymoon, I came upon an Italian brand of yogurt that made a rhubarb variety that, once I tasted, I bought every morning in Venice.  (Except for the last morning, when I tried moving some yogurt cartons to see if a rhubarb carton was hiding in the back. I quickly learned that this is not acceptable behavior in Venice.)  I could not find it in Florence or Rome, nor could my brother find it during his three years living in Milan.  Couldn't find it online, either - I only found a recipe for frozen rhubarb yogurt pops, which I made last year.  They were good but not as good as that damn Venetian yogurt.

So in its absence, I made Bebop-a-Reebop Rhubarb Sauce.

Typically, I like the tart flavor of rhubarb on its own. Just slicing into it, releasing that tangy bouquet - brings me back to my childhood, chomping on a puckery-tart stalk raw from the garden, my mom and dad weeding nearby.  But when the rhubarb is sour, like the batch I got at the market, you have to use a lot of sugar to balance.  Instead, I used strawberries to sweeten, and a small amount of agave to round it out.

The fewer ingredients, the better! Just 2 cups each of strawberries & rhubarb, and 2 tb agave.
(I did add a touch of corn starch when it became clear it was going to be too watery.)

Chop the rhubarb (peel if it's stringy) and strawberries. 
Bring the agave and 1/3 cup water to a simmer and add rhubarb/strawberries.

Simmer for 15-20 minutes, and add a touch of corn starch (I used 1 tsp) if it isn't thickening.

I enjoy my 1/2 cup by alternating rhubarb & yogurt like a parfait, and topping it with a 1/2 cup of my favorite cereal (Honey Oat, from Trader Joe's.)

By the way, if the name of my recipe is confusing, you should know that my family was the kind of Midwestern family that listened to A Prairie Home Companion on Saturday evening car trips.  I can't think of rhubarb without thinking of Bebop-a-Reebop Rhubarb Pie.




(And, yes, be prepared for me to sing the ketchup theme song when I get around to finessing my homemade ketchup recipe.)

Here's part 5 of my week of food loggin' -
Monday, May 23 - 1331 calories
Breakfast - 1/2 cup fat free Greek yogurt, 1/2 cup raspberries, 1/2 cup honey-oat cereal, 1 boiled egg
Lunch - 2 cups steamed broccoli, 1 baked potato, 1 tsp Earth Balance, 2 tb fat free sour cream, 3 oz scallops seared in Pam
Dinner - 1 cup green beans with broth/onions/thyme, 1.5 cups of chicken/basmati/pomegranate-walnut sauce, 2 apricots, 12 cherries
Beverages - 32 oz water, 32 oz unsweetened mojito iced tea, 8 oz milk

OK. That's it for today.  Check back with me tomorrow for Adventure Wednesday - I've got some interesting things to share.  And keep taking care of you!

Tea-Makin' Monday. Or Mojito-Makin' Monday. Or... both?

It's the beginning of a new week, and I'm already up-and-at-'em to finish my writing deadline and get my surgery scheduled.  (Why is it that scheduling surgery is so much like pulling teeth?  Actually, pulling teeth is less of a convoluted process.)

The weekend was a lovely one - we spent some time writing, some time with friends, and some time adventuring.  Plus I completed the third phase of my Cake Pops Quest with surprising results, and I'll post them for you later this week.

I was waiting for this week's Friend Makin' Monday questions, but they seem to be sleeping in with the rest of the fitness blogging community (many of whom were at the FitBloggin conference this weekend.)  So I decided to move forward and turn today into Tea Makin' Monday instead.

My latest passion has been a particular brand of green tea, but I found out recently that the vitamin K in green tea can negatively affect people on blood thinner, so today I wanted to try making iced tea with a black variety.  While at the Hollywood Farmer's Market (on Ivar, not at the Grove) I had a burst of inspiration by a few fresh ingredients I was admiring.  So this morning, I made mojitos.

Not really.  I made Mojito Iced Tea.  It's full of flavor, and about 4 calories per 8 ounces, depending on how much lime juice you add.

The three magic ingredients: Mint Tea, Mexican or Key Limes, and Mint.
If you can't find wee limes, any lime will do.
Also, what is up with calling it "plantation" mint?

First I brewed a full kettle of tea. Mine holds 12 cups, so I used
3 teabags in two bowls (with the water divided at a 1:2 ratio)

I threw some extra mint in while it brewed.  The tea left after 3 minutes, the mint stayed until cool.
Then I strained it into a pitcher and chilled it. (Alternatively, you could pour over ice right away.)

Once it was chilled, I poured a glass over slices of one key lime, the juice of a second key lime,
and a fresh sprig of mint. It is so refreshing that I think my pitcher will be gone before tomorrow!

It feels good to be entering food again.  I'm nearly caught up with the backlog, and as of this morning, I'm entering my calories right after eating, which helps me stay mindful.  I'm still a little high in calories for my personal plan, but now that I'm caught up, I should be able to adjust.  Here are parts 2, 3 and 4 in my food logging week:

Friday, May 20 - 1210 calories
Breakfast: 1/2 cup fat free Greek yogurt, 1/2 cup strawberries, 1 egg, 2 slices light whole wheat, 1 Kraft fat free single
Lunch: 2 cups steamed broccoli with lemon, 1 baked potato, 2 tsp Earth Balance, 2 tb fat free sour cream, chicken wrap sandwich (low-cal tortilla, 1 tsp Vegenaise, 1 oz brie, 2 oz chicken, 2 cherry tomatoes, 1/2 cup spinach)
Dinner: 1.5 cup roasted cauliflower, 1 Kraft fat free single, 1 sausage wrap (low-cal tortilla, 1 veggie sausage, 1 tsp dijon, 2 tb dill pickle), 1 orange, 12 cherries
Beverages: 64 oz water


Saturday, May 21 - 1544 calories
Breakfast: 1/2 cup fat free Greek yogurt, 6 oz fresh pineapple, egg wrap (low-cal tortilla, 1 scrambled egg, 2 tb fresh pico de gallo, 1 fat free Kraft single)
Lunch: 1.5 cups beet & blood orange salad, chicken wrap sandwich (low-cal tortilla, 1 tsp Vegenaise, 1 oz brie, 2 oz chicken, 2 cherry tomatoes, 1/2 cup spinach)
Afternoon snack: 1.5 cups homemade veggie gumbo, 2 lemon cake pops
Dinner at a party: 2 oz Hawaiian chicken, 2 potato chips (yes, 2), 1/4 cup black bean salad, 1 lemon cake pop
Beverages: 64 oz water, 8 oz mixed punch

Sunday, May 22 - 1634 calories
Breakfast: 1/2 cup fat free Greek yogurt, 6 oz fresh pineapple, chicken wrap sandwich (low-cal tortilla, 1 tsp Vegenaise, 1 oz brie, 2 oz chicken, 2 cherry tomatoes, 1/2 cup spinach)
Morning snack: 1 cup strawberries
Lunch:  2 oz sourdough bread, 1 cup homemade bruschetta topping (tomatoes, onion, garlic, basil, balsamic), 1 cup roasted zucchini with 1 oz goat cheese
Afternoon snack: 1 pear
Dinner out: 1/4 cup pomegranate-walnut sauce, 2 oz chicken, 1 cup basmati rice, 2 tb mixed veggie pickle, 1 cup mixed greens with balsamic, 1 oz feta cheese, 1/2 of a lavash pita, 1 tsp butter
Beverages: 8 oz skim milk, 44 oz water, 1/4 cup savory yogurt drink

All right!  Tomorrow I'll be back with my regularly scheduled Weigh-In Tuesday, plus a breakfast recipe that I'm excited to share.  Til then, take care of you!

Fashion Friday... plus summery inspiration

My outfit for this week's Fashion Friday is connected to Adventure Wednesday.   When we celebrated my -50 in 1950, we took it all the way... even from head to toe.

Dress by Torrid (it's getting too big, this is probably its last outing.)
Sweater by Lane Bryant
Necklace is antique
Bracelet by my sister
I'd rather not admit who made my shoes.
(But some of you can probably guess.)

Alas, you can't see Tom's vintage-style camp shirt very well in this photo.

It's beginning to be beautiful and summery in Los Angeles, so I found myself looking at summery things to wear.  I don't have much of a budget for new clothes at the moment (and while in transition like this, I certainly don't need to buy anything more until what I have is completely untailorable.)  So in the meanwhile, it's fun to put together imaginary outfits.  I thought I'd share some of them with you.

The summer line at EShakti.com really hit my sartorial spot.  What I love about the company is that they have a very large range of sizes (not to mention an option to order custom sizes tailored to your measurements.)  So the dresses that are at the crux of these outfits will probably fit you, no matter who you are.

Dress by EShakti
Hat by Kate Spade
Recycled Magazine Earrings by Anthropologie
Recycled Skateboard Bracelets by Etsy Artist "Dektout"
Shoes by BC Footwear

Dress by EShakti
Jewelry by Anthropologie
Shoes by Nine West

Dress by EShakti
Necklace by Etsy artist "lilywcouture"
Earrings by Etsy artist "mxmjewelry"
Shoes by Kate Spade

Detail of the skirt embroidery

And, part 1 of my 7-part food-loggin' series:
Thursday May 19 
Breakfast: 1/4 cup fat free greek yogurt, 3 pixie tangerines, 1 boiled egg, 2 slices whole wheat toast, 1 tsp Earth Balance
Lunch: 1 cup homemade panzanella, 2 cups homemade veggie gumbo
Dinner: Chicken wrap (low-cal tortilla, 2 oz chicken, 3 cherry tomatoes, 1/2 cup raw spinach, 1 tsp veganaise, 1 oz brie), 1.5 cups strawberry-cucumber salad

OK!  That it for this week - I'll be back with you on Monday.  I hope you all have a lovely weekend, and take care of you!

A Beginner's Guide, plus Friend Makin' Monday

A lot of people have asked me the same question lately.

"How are you doing this?" 

I understand why they're asking.  I look different.

Together, Tom and I are down 78 pounds since January.

More importantly, I feel different.  I'm stronger and I have more energy.  And one thing that many friends have noted is that I seem happy.

At first when I started hearing that word, I was a little confused.  I thought they were confusing my energy with my attitude.  I'm a firm believer that thinner does not necessarily equal happier.  But then I started hearing it more and more.  "I'm glad to see you so happy."  "You wear happy well."  I caught a glimpse of myself in a mirror at a party this weekend, and I was laughing and smiling. That's when I realized it.  I was happy.  I am happy.

I don't think it's the weight change, specifically.  I think it's the kind of attention and energy I'm giving to myself.  The kind of care that I never used to let myself take.  I wasn't worth the energy.  I didn't have the energy.  There was too much on my plate, with a very long to-do list each day.  And I wasn't at the bottom of that to-do list... I wasn't even on it.

That brings me back to the question at hand.  How am I doing this?  The answer is both simple and complex.  The short version is that I made myself a priority in my own life.  And the long version... well, that involves a lot of changes, both small and large. Describing them could span a whole week's worth of blog entries.  So... guess what?  Today I begin a week-long series that I hope will help inspire you to take good care of someone who matters to me.  You.

You can do this too.

Each day, I will post a new Beginner's Guide topic, with a series of tips and ideas that will help you put yourself on your own to-do list.  So, with no further adieu...

...getting started

Starting anything is hard.  Especially if you've developed a pattern.  Just like a vampire's jawbone, they're hard to break.  (Pardon me, we've been watching too much Buffy lately.)

Before you get going, there are a few things you need to think about, and a few actions you might want to take.

• For the love of Pete, see a doctor.  I'm not one, I don't play one on TV, and my weight loss journey has been fully under the supervision of my own doctor.  And if you don't have a doctor...

• For the love of Pete's fluffy white kitten dangling dangerously from a tree branch, get a doctor, or find a free clinic.  Routine check-ups help find and prevent issues that may otherwise go ignored.  And if there's something that is scaring you away from seeing a doctor...

• See a therapist.  I really believe that working through my emotions and my history has been key to making positive changes in my life.  If you, like me, find yourself eating for emotional reasons, there may be some behavioral patterns that your therapist can help you address. 

• Think about what you want out of your life.  Do you have a particular dream for the future?  Do you have a trip you want to take, or a career you want to build, or a family you want to nurture?  I want those things for you, too.  Unfortunately, life is finite and it's pretty short. It's very easy to ignore the long-term.  But it's time to start moving toward what you want. 
  
  When you think about those things, how do you imagine yourself?  If you want to travel, do you imagine yourself heading out for long walks exploring Paris, or climbing the Aztec temple steps?  If you're thinking about a family, do you see yourself playing on the floor with your grandchildren someday?  If so, you need to start taking good care of yourself.  You need to build your strength, you need to develop a positive relationship with your food.  You need to make yourself a priority. 
  
  If visuals help you motivate yourself, consider finding a picture (or creating a collage) of your goal, and hanging it somewhere you can easily see it, so that every time you want to skip your workout or drown your bad day in a hot fudge sundae, you can remind yourself that what you choose to do today affects what you'll be able to do tomorrow.

• Find a buddy.  Left to my own devices, it's possible I might eat deep-fried southwestern egg rolls morning, noon and night. Or I certainly might have before.  But every day, I lean on Tom - as he leans on me - for support.  When I have the urge to eat something outside of my plan, I talk it through with him.  When I want to stay in bed, he pokes me in the shoulder until I have no choice but to get up.  And vice versa. 
  
  Your accountability buddy should be someone you trust, and someone who is on a similar path to yours.  If you have a spouse or partner, I highly recommend you support each other on this path.  Like quitting smoking or getting sober (though without the ability to go cold turkey), it's much more challenging to kick a habit when you have to smell the smoke (or the pizza.)  I actually have several accountability buddies...  Rena, David, Teresa, friends from Slimmons... and all of you! 

• Remember that you are worth taking care of.  It sounds a little corny, I know.  But here's the thing: did you eat mindfully today, or did you eat whatever was the office ordered?  Did you exercise, or did you collapse on the couch after work?  Are you really taking care of yourself?  Because you are worth it. 
  
  You are worth taking an hour away from your desk or couch, even if you feel like you don't have the energy - because when you start taking care of yourself, the energy will come back in spades.  You are worth being spoiled with delicious and fresh food, even if you think you don't have the budget for it, because there are ways to reduce the cost.  Even if you think you don't have time for it, because think about it: waiting in line or at a restaurant for food takes just about as long as actually making it for yourself. 
  
  Regardless of all of these things, you're just flat-out worth it. You have this one body, and this one lifetime in it, and making things harder for yourself is only going to... make things harder for yourself.  You can do this, and you are worth it.

All right, that's it for this "beginner's" Beginners Guide.  Come back tomorrow for a beginner's guide to exercise!  I'll have some playful ideas about how to get more activity into your life.  The old adage says "use it or lose it."  And there's a reason it's stuck around this long. 

I am hoping to spread the message of putting yourself on your own to-do list... especially because there are so many people out there like me, who have a hard time making themselves a priority.  If there is anyone in your life who might appreciate reading this series or my blog, please consider sharing it with them.  There are links at the bottom of the post to share via Facebook or email, and thanks in advance for helping spread the message.

Don't forget that you can sign up to receive my blog by email or Reader - and don't forget to keep taking care of you!

I'll leave you today with my answers for this week's Friend Makin' Monday, and my food log for the Friday, Saturday and Sunday. This will bring my food logging week to a close - but I did enjoy sharing it, so I'm sure I'll bring it back occasionally in the future.

Today I felt... productive and peaceful. It really helps me to stick to my schedule, and returning to it this morning was just the balance I needed.

Today I saw.... that my favorite indigo-blue dress - which had been too baggy - fits again, thanks to the tailoring prowess of my mother-in-law. Pictures soon.

Today I ate... my usual breakfast. Greek yogurt with berries & honey oat cereal, plus a boiled Easter egg.

Today I kissed... my husband goodbye before he left on our weekly food shopping trip.  (We're delayed a day because of the holiday.)

Today I bought... nothing, but I expect that Tom is about to purchase our groceries.

Today I heard... an episode of This American Life. It's my very favorite podcast.

Today I lost... weight, I expect. But I don't know how much; I have been stepping on the scale less (mostly just on weigh-in Tuesday.)

Today I decided... to start my new half-and-half writing schedule.  Half blog work, half projects with Tom.  (Currently another spec script for our portfolio.)  So far, so good!

Today I need... to have our weekly budget meeting.  The way we handle money in the past few years is a big improvement on our younger spending habits.  

Today I wish... that we will all have a healthy, happy, productive day.  And I think we can make that wish come true!


Friday 4/20/11 - total 1389 calories
Breakfast: 1/2 cup fat free greek yogurt, 1/2 cup strawberries, 1/4 cup honey oat cereal, 2 Angel Egg halves
Lunch: 1 wrap sandwich (low-carb tortilla, 1 tsp veganaise, 2 cherry tomatoes, 2 oz grilled chicken, 1 oz brie), 2 carrots, 1 tangerine, 12 red grapes, 2 Angel Egg halves
Afternoon Snack at a movie theater: Mediterranean wrap (lavash, 1/2 cup cucumber, 1/2 cup tomatoes, lettuce, 2-3 chopped olives, 1 tb hummus, 1 oz feta cheese)
Dinner: Veggie burger sandwich (2 slices light whole wheat, 1 tsp Vegenaise, 1 morningstar farms patty, 1 Light Laughing Cow cheese wedge, 5 pickle slices), 1 cup turnip "fries" (my favorite 30 calories EVER), 2 tb ketchup
Beverages: 64 oz water, 8 oz skim milk

Saturday 4/20/11 - total 1390 calories
Breakfast: 1 banana, 1 boiled egg, 1 tb chocolate frosting (I was making it for cake pops and tested.)
Lunch at Tender Greens: 4 oz herb-seared albacore, 1 cup baby spinach/goat cheese/hazelnut salad, 1 cup mixed grilled veggies 
Dinner at a party: 2 halves of Angel Egg, 1 oz ham, 1 tb aioli, 1 oz rye bread, 1 oz white bread, 1/2 cup white bean salad, 1/4 cup quinoa salad, 3 strawberries, and 1 Cadbury Creme Egg.  And you know what?  I think my tastes have changed. I preferred the strawberries.
Beverages: 64 oz water, 8 oz skim milk, 8 oz of a beautiful Easter-Egg purple cocktail made with Creme de Violet and vodka.  Thank you, mixologist Brendan!

Sunday 4/20/11 - total 1482 calories
Breakfast: 2 halves of an Angel Egg.  This is not enough breakfast.
Lunch: 2 halves of an Angel Egg, 1 cup of snap peas with leeks and mint, 1/2 tsp butter, 2 oz tillapia, 1 cup of Greek yogurt potato salad (4 oz potatoes, 2 tb greek yogurt, tb dill relish, 1 tsp dijon, 1/2 cup cucumber, tb scallions), 1 cup mixed greens with 1/4 cup oro blanco grapefruit and 1/4 cup tangerine, 1/4 cup homemade lemon-basil sorbet
Afternoon snack: 2 slices light whole wheat toast with 1 tsp of my father's blackberry preserves
Dinner: wrap sandwich (2 oz tillapia, tortilla, 1 tsp Vegenaise, 1 oz goat cheese, 4 cherry tomatoes), 1 roasted potato, 1 tb ketchup, 1.5 cups tomato/cucumber/mint salad
Evening snack: 1 cup potato salad, 10 pickle chips, 1 oz chocolate
Beverages: 64 oz water

Angel Eggs and Easter Food Plans

Easter is Sunday, and for most people celebrating the holiday, there's sure to be a ton of scrumptious food, tempting mindful eaters to throw caution to the bunny rabbits.  But that's not my plan.

This is the first big family-type holiday we're celebrating since we started our plan. (Side note... I hate the word "plan" used in context of weight loss.  Much like my friend Audra hates the word "craft" used in the context of acting.  But sometimes there's just no better word for it.)

So Tom and I have crafted a springy menu full of fresh, healthy, and still delicious foods we'll be serving for Easter.  One of these includes a new recipe I've been building for the occasion.

Growing up, holidays meant a veritable groaning board full of food.  (Do you know why a buffet is called a groaning board? Because the table wood was so heavily laden, the planks would groan.  Much like the buffet-eaters would grown afterward, I imagine.  When your tables and guests are groaning from food, it might be a sign that you should scale back.)  Easter - aside from the choco-fest in our baskets - was never without my mother's signature deviled eggs.  Which I loved.  But when made with full-fat mayonnaise, could add up quickly if you didn't limit yourself to one egg.

So this year, I have created a new recipe that I call Angel Eggs.  A few simple ingredient swaps preserve the tangy flavor and creamy texture, while removing 75% of the fat and 50% of the cholesterol.  Not to mention retaining 100% of the protein.

Start with a few simple ingredients. (Do use 6 eggs in total.)

Peel and halve the boiled eggs. Discard 3 yolks, and mash the other 3.
Once fully mashed, stir in the Greek yogurt and mustard until smooth,
followed by the dill relish (if dill is your style. If not, go sweet or skip it!)

Chop the chives and fold to combine. (I love herb scissors, by the way. Don't they look cool?)

Here's a helpful trick - whether or not you have bakery frosting tips, you can use a regular
plastic zippy bag to stuff your eggs. Simply snip off a corner (just large enough
to insert the tip, if you're using one) and spoon the filling into the bag.

This makes for an neat and easy stuffing process, though you can
scoop and spoon the filling that way if you prefer.

Garnish with a few more chopped chives.

And here's a fun tip... if you need to transport the eggs, but have no fancy-pants
deviled egg carrier, you can use baking liners to keep them upright!

Ingredients

• 6 eggs (using 12 white halves, but only 6 whole yolks)
• 2 tb fat free plain Greek yogurt (the thick consistency is preferable to regular yogurt.)
• 1/2 tb dijon mustard
• 1 tb dill relish
• 1.5 tb chives (with 1 tsp reserved for garnish.)

And check out the nutrition facts!

Along with the Angel Eggs, we'll be serving tilapia en papillote with lemon and thyme, fresh snap pea pods with mint, a citrus-and-greens salad, a reduced-calorie version of my mother's potato salad (using, you guessed it, Greek yogurt) and lemon-basil sorbet for dessert. Don't you wish you were Eastering at our house?

I'm also allowing myself one Easter treat this weekend, which I will be enjoying at our friends' Easter party on Saturday.  I'm a sucker for Cadbury Creme Eggs... but one is all I ever really need.  And it turns out, as Easter candy goes, one Creme Egg is 150 calories. A decent portion for a treat.  And dammit, I am going to enjoy it!

Before I bid you adieu for the holiday weekend, I'll share part 4 of my week of daily food blogging:

Thurssday 4/20/11 - total 1429 calories
Breakfast: 1/2 cup fat free greek yogurt, 1/2 cup strawberries, 1/4 cup honey oat cereal, 1 boiled egg
Lunch: Bowl of homemade noodle stir-fry (2 oz soba noodles, 1/2 bell pepper, 1/4 onion, 1 clove garlic, 2 tsp fresh ginger, 1/2 tb light soy sauce), 7 scallops, 2 cups steamed broccoli with lemon, 1 navel orange
Pre-Slimmons Fuel: 1/2 cup fat-free no-sugar-added frozen yogurt from Menchie's, 1/4 cup kiwi, 1/4 cup blueberries
Dinner: 2 roasted carrots, 1/2 whole wheat pita, 2 tb garlic hummus, 1 wrap sandwich (low-carb tortilla, 1 tsp veganaise, 2 cherry tomatoes, 2 oz grilled chicken, 1 oz brie)
Evening snack: 1/4 cup honey oat cereal
Beverages: 64 oz water, 8 oz skim milk


Have a lovely Easter/Passover/Spring weekend, everyone - and keep taking care of you!