Friday, August 5, 2011


Made you look!

But, actually, boobs really are the topic of today's Fashion Friday column.  If you're opposed to the discussion of sweater puppies, you best be on your way.  (Otherwise, please know that this discussion will be safe-for-work.)

Sweater puppies.
photo via videobash

I developed pretty young, which wasn't necessarily fun for me, since it meant I'd have yet another measurement nudging me out of the girls' clothes department.  I even remember overhearing another girl in my sixth-grade class say - pejoratively - that "if Heidi cut off her boobs, they'd make two holes in the floor."  Later in life, having a sizable rack might've been something I would appreciate... but at the time, I felt nothing but shame.

Sizable rack.
photo via WallDesigns

As I gained weight, my breasts ended up looking not-so-large in comparison to the rest of me.  In college, a couple of crude guys in acting class were talking about our classmates' assets - whose were big, and who were lacking.  I remember piping up that they'd forgotten mine... to which one of them replied "well, you're big so your tits don't count."  Thanks, sport. You stay classy!

That is one beautiful tit.
Image via DailyMail

I eventually came to appreciate my body, and have felt partial to my breasts ever since.  Until... well... until now.

Exercise and healthy eating has done all kinds of wonderful things for me.  It has also... well... it has also wreaked all kinds of havoc upon my breasts.  What was buoyant now sinks.  And I thought I was stuck with this for life.

What I didn't realize was that as my clothing size changed, so did my bra size.  Why wouldn't I have thought of this?  I don't know, but man, until as recently as a month ago, I was still wearing some of the bras I was wearing last year.

That all changed when my friend Alexa, the lovely Curvy Nerd, dragged me to Intimacy, a lingerie store in Culver City.

"It's amazing," she said, "it changed my life."

"You're crazy," I said, "but I love an adventure."  So the two of us, and my visiting friend Rena, headed over to the store.

When we arrived at the storefront, I became anxious.  Hanging in the window were a large array of beautiful, delicate... tiny... bras.  I have boobs that are neither delicate nor tiny, and in the past, there had to be a very large amount of structure (wire, foam, armor...) to support me.  But Alexa assured me that they had bras for all sizes.

I met with my sizing specialist, who explained that they sized ladies visually, without a measuring tape.  She took one look at my boobs and then left.  Which seemed embarrassing, but then she came back with an armful of bras, which she helped me shimmy into.

It turns out that the bra band I thought I should be wearing was TEN INCHES LARGER than the bra band I needed to be wearing.  And that when I'm wearing the right-sized bra - and one that's well-made - there's no drooping, and I can actually wear delicate lace.  Who knew?

To demonstrate the difference between the bra I was wearing, and the bra I purchased at Intimacy, I took some photos this morning, while wearing a light jersey tank from Lane Bryant.

Old and droopy on the left. New and perky on the right.
Tom noticed that I was smiling much more in the better bra.


Again, old on left, new on right.


So... if you're feeling a little droopy these days, by all means head out to a bra sizing with specialists.  There are Intimacy stores in Atlanta, Boston, Chicago, Dallas, Detroit, Houston, Miami, Los Angeles, New York, Orange County, Philadelphia, San Diego, Scottsdale, and Washington D.C. 

And if you're not near an Intimacy store, I highly recommend seeking out a bra specialty store (not, like, a Lane Bryant or a Victoria's Secret, but a real specialty store.)  Wearing the right bra can mean the difference between good posture and bad posture... or confidence and embarrassment.

I'm off for now, but I'll be back next week with more fun and joyful ways to take care of you and I.  Until then, I hope you'll keep doing good things for you!


  1. You are smiling more in the second photo! :)

  2. I totally loved the sweater puppies, beautiful tit and the sizable rack pictures. Had me cracking up :)~

    I want to go to Intimacy, but am hesitant to make an investment until I lose some more weight. I should make it one of my rewards ;)

  3. Why would Victoria Secret not work? I think that is the only place around me :9

  4. I need to go to Intimacy! Unfortunately, I'd have to drive 4-5 hours to get to the closest one (DC). Oh well, as I should wait until I've lost a bit more weight and actually have money to spend on bras. :)

    I really like your ruffly pink shirt! And you are smiling more in the new bra. :)

  5. You look fantastic in that color! And I can see the difference a well-fitting bra makes.

    I had boobs by 5th grade. Not the womanly boobs I have now, but bigger and more noticeable than any of the other girls who were in 5th grade with me. I started wearing a training bra in 5th grade, but was fortunately left alone by the 5th grade boys because I think they were clueless about what it was, or afraid of it. By 6th grade, things had changed, and I often got my bra straps snapped by a group of particularly mean 6th grade boys. Because they were under the impression that snapping girls' bra straps is what you do when the girl is wearing a bra. I wasn't the only one in that predicament in 6th grade, either. A couple of other girls had developed and were wearing training bras, and were subject to bra strap snapping as well.

    At that point, me, my boobs and the rest of my body started a very odd love-hate relationship. By junior high, I saw that my boobs were a way for me to get attention. Instead of getting angry at the boys who would snap my bra straps, I'd scream loudly, overreact, and chase them around with the intent of hitting them. I thought they liked me for acting that way, and I would sometimes specifically wear tighter shirts to make sure they noticed my boobs and my bra.

    And then I started realizing that none of the other girls were acting that way, and that none of the other girls really liked me for acting that way. So I stopped trying to get attention from boys with my boobs, stopped screaming and running around after them. I went through a period of wearing baggy, shapeless clothing to hide my boobs that lasted throughout most of high school. I went to high school in the '80s, though, when baggy was kind of the fashion, so I could wear trendy clothes and not look too much like I was 'trying' to hide my body.

    In college, my perspective began to change. I started wanting attention from guys, but I was desperately afraid to admit that I did. I was a budding feminist and I thought the idea of admitting that I wanted a boyfriend would negate the feminist riot grrrl exterior I was trying to cultivate. So I decided to dress "sexy," in tighter tops, showing off a lot of cleavage, but wouldn't say a word. If guys complimented me on my boobs, I'd just shrug it off and say "yeah, whatever," pretending I didn't care. And then I started getting interest from guys with whom it became obvious, after a couple of dates, that they were only interested in having casual sex. After learning the hard way about that on a number of occasions, I went back to wearing baggy clothes.

    It took me a while to learn to walk the fine line of appreciating my body and not seeing it as only an attention-grabbing object. But that meant I had to look at *all* of my body, not just my boobs, and learn to appreciate all of it. I still have my good days and bad days, and sometimes still have a conflicted relationship with my boobs. But it's better than it was in my younger years.

    My boobs and belly are the main areas of my body where I carry weight. So if I gain weight, my boobs and belly get bigger. If I lose weight, they get smaller. Usually my boobs go first. That creates another whole issue for me, since I've always identified as "the gal with big boobs," even after making peace (mostly) with my body. When my boobs get smaller, I feel like I'm losing a part of myself...even though I know I'm much more than just my exterior.

    In response to Hyla's comment about Victoria's Secret, I haven't been able to shop there since I was in high school. For some fat folks, Vicky doesn't have the cup or band size that we need. I sized out of their bras years ago, and since they don't consider me a customer, I don't consider them a viable retailer for any of my undergarment, body lotion or perfuming needs.

  6. Wow..what a difference the right bra can make! I need some too! You look great!

  7. As Kenlie said WOW, what a difference. I definitely need new bras.

    I love that Lane Bryant tank top, you look great.

  8. I have a similar boob history. I remember in high school at a party and playing "truth or dare" as high school kids will want to do..I took truth. 'what size bra do you wear?" response was 40 --too ashamed to say 40DD and so I copped out by only giving part of the answer which was a disappointment apparently. I also went to a bra specialty place and am Amazed to fit in to a size 38G. A waist, a real waist. Your photos look great.